Change it Up

I came to a realization today that as I age, the things I become used to and expect to have every day will one day end. I know what you're thinking, "Thank you Captain Obvious", but understand that no matter how many people tell you this, it's not until it happens that you become locked in a sense of fear or even panic. Stepping back and looking at the situation from another point of view isn't possible until you come to grips with the fact that nothing you can do will keep things from changing. As time goes by, families change, parents, grandparents, spouses, loved ones and friends pass on. One thing that never changes is that nothing stays the same. This should be easy to adapt to, after all, we were made to adapt. We can fly, travel to the moon, survive in the most horrific conditions imaginable, but a family member passes away and we crumble like a house of cards. I think that this is by design. If we never suffered loss or said goodbye to a friend, we would atrophy into an instinct driven animal. Yes, animals suffer loss, but only when their needs aren't met. We have the remarkable ability of memory and mental imagery, and it is in this aspect we find ourselves reminiscing about the people, places and material things of our past. This exposes us to emotions that can help us and hurt us. I often find myself thinking of embarrassments and mistakes I've made, family members long passed, great times and bad times. I find one common thread binding it all together... Love. Not the "I love ice cream", but the "I would give everything I own for one more chance, just one minute to tell him or her how I really feel". I think that I have a unique perception of change. When I was a child (9), our house burned and we lost everything, I know, tragic right? It was the best time of my life. My parents were on the verge of divorce, we lived on great property but the house was a dump, and our lives seemed to be falling apart. When the house went, my parents patched things up (not easily, but effectively), we got a new house, and insurance money had my brother and I sleeping in brass beds with new close on our backs. We fared better after the fire then before. Change is not easy, but I can tell you it opens a whole new book of options. Material things are just that, material. I wonder how many people would feel complete liberation if they just walked away from their possessions. I wonder how many people could walk away from their possessions. Easily thought, but not easily accomplished, giving up everything goes against our nature and our societal structure. We spend our lives acquiring things, gathering things and saving things, but for what? Is there a requirement that our families must have to rummage through our junk and sell the things of value just so they don't have to lug it all around after we die? I could walk out to my garage and stretch out my arm in any direction and knock over about 20 things that are USELESS! What for? Is it so important to keep this garbage that we must construct housing for our garbage? Admit it, how many people only have to go the the "Junk" drawer in the kitchen to find 15 pounds of items that "could be worth something someday". That stuff is only worth what someone will pay for it, and I doubt someone will pay $25 for a Coca-Cola Coaster that you found at a yard sale for only 25 cents. Yes I've seen television shows that tell stories of that great "find", but I hate to break it to you, the odds are you're not that lucky. So when we start collecting things for sentimental reasons, we justify to ourselves that "it's all I have" of someone long passed. Remembering loved ones is important, but not at the cost of your living space. My wife was given much of her grandmother's dishes and the like and with these items was a set of salt and pepper shakers. Very nice set but they had extremely small holes in the caps. One evening during dinner I got tired of shaking the pepper shaker like a can of paint, and went to the garage, grabbed a drill, and proceeded to put a 3/16 inch hole in the middle of the cap........ I then proceeded back out to the garage where I spent the rest of the evening, after I ate my dinner over my workbench. My wife still carries bitterness about this incident but my thought is, "I will not sacrifice functionality for the sanctity of a memory". I feel that it is important to remember that if we are going to use things, they must work properly or what's the purpose of having to go out of our way to use something simply to remember someone with every shake. I thought I would rather happily shake the pepper out instead of cursing her family while my arm goes numb throwing my shoulder out of socket to get three flakes of pepper.

Work Through It

It's been a while since I posted anything, I guess I've been happy and had nothing to get worked up about.
What has happened to work ethic and dedication? When did it become the norm to hear some sniveling whiner complain about how "hard" their job is? Why am I spending most of my day baby sitting instead of doing my job? Furthermore, why am I not getting paid as a nanny while I'm wiping snotty noses from adolescent acting twenty somethings that still live with their parents? I'll tell you my opinion and you can form whatever opinion pops into your head. I think this problem stems from the fact that no adult in their lives has told them to shut up, get to work and figure it out. Schools have become so focused on getting kids past tests that they no longer spend time teaching students to solve problems. Life is not multiple choice. "Should I 'A' fix this car, 'B' go to lunch, 'C' go watch Youtube on the computer, or 'D' stand here looking stupid and ask the next person that walks by to show me how to do my job? 'D' sounds good"............ I'm not sure who to pin the blame on, but one thing is certain, in twenty years when the working class is made up of these mindless miscreants, I wonder what will motivate them. I can imagine what will constitute a day's work. Clock in, surf the "mind net" for a while, stand around talking about the previous evening's funny stories and then clock out for break. I joke but think about it, do we really have confidence in a future work ethic? I know that everyone thinks of their children as smart, well behaved and capable, but how many children do you know that are born welfare recipients? I'm not saying I'm perfect, after all, I am typing this on my laptop while at work. Keep in mind, I only get paid if I'm working on a car and there is currently no work.
Every now and then I see a glimmer of hope in a teenager that is working hard because he or she is trying to save up for something. Then I have my hopes dashed when I hear the same teenager griping because "Mom and Dad" won't pay for the car. I think we shelter our kids too much, let them fall down once in a while. Let them go without every now and then just so they know how unsatisfied desires burn. Allow them to feel jealousy toward a friend or acquaintance for that "cool" thing they got for their birthday. These are all feelings they must learn how to deal with anyway, why not start young? We never want our kids to feel this way but lets face it, it's inevitable. Eventually they will be faced with a situation that they feel inadequate, and without tools to deal with it, they will react irrationally. Then instead of working harder to achieve their goals, they will feel entitled and think that it's someone else's responsibility to provide for them. I wish I could give my son everything he'll ever need, but then he will just "need" more. Most people would agree that hard work is important, but how hard are you willing to see you'r child work? Would you ever allow him or her to develop blisters or smash a finger or two performing manual labor? We may think tough but how far would you actually follow through? Work isn't easy, or it would be called "playing", and some games are more strenuous than work. Think about it next time you tell you'r child to clean his or her room, I have never seen a child jump up and run into their room yelling "HOORAYYY!! I get to clean my room!!". However they know it has to be done, or will Mommy or Daddy do it for them?